Chapters 9-11

Well Chapter 9 was probably my favorite, by far. It was the easiest for me to comprehend because, like I said previously, I'm a psychology major, and it spoke a language I understand. I liked how conflict was broken down into particular stages: escalation, stalemate and lastly de-escalation (if they can go beyond stalemate). Escalation, itself, has "three dynamics", selective perception, self-fulfilling prophecies, and entrapment.

I personally like discussing self-fulfilling prophecies because I think it is something each of us does in everyday life. It is when you have a belief or even prejudice about someone or something and therefore when you look at they're actions you only observe that which supports your beliefs. Then you react to just those actions and they become what ever it was that you "thought" they were thus, supporting your original hypothesis. I like the saying "If you look for the bad, you will always find it." I think the same is true for the reverse. I think most don’t even realize that they are being prejudice and that it affecting the actual outcome of particular situations.

Chapter 10 discussed a woman's place at the negotiation table and how they approach and handle conflict in a different way, due to psychological differences between males and females. I believe that a blend of these differences is actually effective. Most women would rather talk than "fight" about an issue, and even then, as the book points out, they talk "differently" than men do. I think that a mix is definitely necessary. I found the analysis of women very interesting and right on target as well.


I liked the information provided in chapter 11; the statistics on effective negotiators, and the difference aspects of effective and ineffective aggressive and cooperative negotiators, in particular. I like how the “personalities” were broken down in to objectives, traits and their approach to the same situation. And it also illustrated they’re possible weaknesses as well. I agree that one needs to master both styles in order to adapt according to the situation and the style of the competitor.